IELTS Writing - How to Organize Your Essay for Better Results
Some people believe that continuous self-improvement is essential for personal success, while others argue that individuals should accept themselves as they are.
Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Sample Essay Answer
Self-improvement has long been a topic of discussion, with contrasting viewpoints regarding its necessity for personal success. While some argue that continuous self-improvement is crucial, others advocate for self-acceptance. This essay will examine both perspectives and present arguments for each, followed by my own opinion.
On one hand, proponents of continuous self-improvement assert that it is essential for personal success. They argue that in a rapidly evolving world, individuals must constantly enhance their skills and knowledge to stay competitive. For instance, in the professional realm, acquiring new expertise and improving existing abilities can lead to career advancement and increased job prospects. Moreover, ongoing self-improvement can foster personal growth and self-confidence, enabling individuals to overcome challenges and reach their full potential. By constantly striving for self-improvement, people can also become more adaptable and resilient in the face of changing circumstances.
On the other hand, those in favor of self-acceptance contend that individuals should embrace themselves as they are. They argue that self-acceptance promotes mental well-being and contentment. Instead of constantly striving for perfection, accepting one's strengths and weaknesses can lead to greater self-compassion and inner peace. Additionally, self-acceptance encourages authenticity, allowing individuals to be true to themselves and live in alignment with their values and aspirations. This, in turn, can foster healthy relationships and a sense of fulfillment in life.
While both perspectives have their merits, I believe that a balanced approach is key. Continuous self-improvement should be pursued, but with a foundation of self-acceptance. By accepting ourselves as imperfect beings, we can strive for growth without succumbing to excessive self-criticism or feeling inadequate. Self-acceptance provides a healthy mindset, allowing individuals to embrace their strengths while acknowledging areas that require improvement. This balance enables personal development while maintaining a positive self-image and mental well-being.
In conclusion, the debate surrounding self-improvement versus self-acceptance is complex and multifaceted. While continuous self-improvement is crucial for personal success in a dynamic world, self-acceptance is equally important for mental well-being and contentment. Striking a balance between the two is key to achieving personal growth while maintaining a positive self-image. Ultimately, individuals should embrace self-improvement with self-acceptance as a guiding principle.
Expert Analysis
- Contrasting viewpoints: The essay clearly presents and discusses both perspectives on self-improvement and self-acceptance, demonstrating a balanced approach and comprehensive understanding of the topic.
- Complex sentence structures: The essay utilizes a variety of complex sentence structures, showcasing a wide range of grammatical structures and demonstrating the ability to convey ideas effectively.
- Vocabulary: The essay employs a diverse range of vocabulary, including academic and domain-specific words (e.g., personal success, self-compassion, mental well-being), demonstrating a strong command of vocabulary and enhancing the overall quality of the essay.
- Coherence and cohesion: The essay is well-organized with clear paragraph divisions, logical progression of ideas, and cohesive linking words and phrases (e.g., on one hand, on the other hand, in conclusion), contributing to the overall coherence of the essay.
- Opinion with justification: The writer provides a clear opinion supported by reasoned arguments and examples, showcasing critical thinking and the ability to express ideas persuasively.